news evolution

This should be an interesting post because it's a couple separate posts rolled into one. I combined them because I didn't post the earlier one(s) before there was new news. So here you go...

So... Once upon a time, there was this job: the administrators were very friendly and approachable (the interview was more like a conversation instead of a one-sided-awkward-me-talking-the-whole-time thing), the school looked really great, I loved their belief statements and goals, and overall it was just exactly what I wanted in a job... I wanted that position so badly!
Well...I didn't get it... I'm so bummed out.
Part of the bummer was that I invested a lot of time, money, and metal energy into thinking about, preparing for, and stressing out about finding out if I got the job or not. I was mentally exhausted and then ultimately I didn't get it. Stink!!!
I felt a little bit like 'well, I was so close with this job and since I didn't get it, I might as well give up because nobody wants to hire me'. *tears*
BUT, I am trying to have a good attitude instead and to not get too down on myself by remembering all the positive and praiseworthy things about the situation:
They narrowed us down to their 3 top candidates (out of literally hundreds) and I got a second interview and got to show them lesson plans. In the end, they said they had a really hard time choosing but decided to go with the candidate that had just a little bit more experience.
The lady I talked to said that they were really impressed with my interviews and with what I brought to the table and that she thought everything went really well. She asked to keep my info on file for future reference and mentioned recommending me to another principal/school that might have an opening in August. *fingers crossed* I hope she does.
At least that's one less person that I have to compete with... right?
So, I'm just praying that Heavenly Father will bless my efforts and help me find the job that I'm supposed to have and one that will be good for me. (Also, Steven gave me a blessing that I would feel successful no matter the outcome of that second interview was so that was nice and reassuring...)
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So I'm kinda tired of interviews, I always leave thinking about all the things I could have said or could have done better, but I choose to believe and trust that I will get the job that I'm supposed to have...
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And then this happened on July 6th...

That day (Wednesday), I went to an interview at a charter school in the early afternoon.
It was just weird and stressful and awful all around.
I was stressed to get there on time and then to find a way into the school- all the doors were locked.
Then I was overhearing the interviewee before me answer their questions (I HATE that!). He was a native speaker and had already been a teacher for like 7 years (or something like that). (How can I compete with that!?!)

He talked and talked and talked and I became less and less confident and more and more insecure as I waited for almost half an hour (ridiculous!) trying not to hear him talking.
When it was finally my turn, I think that in my mind I had pretty much already decided that I wasn't getting the job and questioning why they would even call me when they had this other dude coming in too?!? Ah!
Then during the interview, they didn't even introduce themselves and it really felt like they weren't even listening to me. They cut me off once (after it seemed like they let that other dude talk for as long as he wanted). They were disinterested, distracted, and tuned out. They kept glancing out the window of the office and stuff like that. I felt ignored, disrespected, deflated, and disheartened.

I answered most of their questions okay (there was one question that I botched), but mostly I felt like I was just not saying what they wanted to hear. Then at the end of the interview, one the the guys (I was interviewing with 2) actually got up and left to talk to someone else before my interview was really over. I was left with the one guy to ask questions to and he said some things that were pretty awkward (like how he gets complaints from parents because he isn't nice to his students (like I seem to be) and he yells at them sometimes- what am I supposed to say to that?!?!)
Also, during this part, I got a look at the clipboard he was writing on and noticed that I scored 1-3 out of 10 on all the questions that they asked me. And, unless 1 is good and 10 is bad (which seems really counter-intuitive), I was just thinking 'Really!?!? I did that awful!?!' :(

Well the interview finally ended and as I was headed out the door we discovered that the guy that I got left with at the end actually knows Steven from high school. At least this guy has a good opinion of Steven because apparently Jake, Steven, and Jared were some of the only guys that he got along with in school. More awkward. (Even though I didn't know his name, we actually figured out who he was- I described him and mentioned a name I thought I heard someone say and Steven remembered him. Steven said that he was sorry that I had to interview with him because he remembered him being really awkward in high school.)
I don't think I adequately described how truly awful that interview was. I was so so glad to leave.

(Back story:

The previous Thursday (while I was at Lagoon with my sisters-in-law), I got a call and voice message about an interview for the next day at West Jordan High School. For whatever reason, I couldn’t the most important of the 2 phone numbers correctly (I listened to the message seriously 10 times) and so I couldn’t get a hold of him. I left a message at the other phone number at went on playing at Lagoon. Well, when he hadn’t called me back by 9 am the next morning, I listened to the message again, finally got the number right, and called him back. We set up the interview for an hour and a half away.

About this same time, I read an email from my last professor. She was passing along important information about the job at West Jordan High School. (She didn't know I was interviewing; she was just making me aware of an available position.) So just shortly before the interview (and also at the very beginning of the interview) I found out what the specific position was that I was interviewing for...
It was to teach Spanish 2, 3, AP, and Latinos In Action)!
I went into the interview thinking that for sure they wouldn't pick me. There was no way I was going to be their top choice for this job. I guess that just made me really relaxed during the interview. I just didn't feel stressed and I actually felt really laid back and comfortable. At one point they asked me about my late work policy and I said something like, "Oh... (big sigh). I'm pretty lax about that." and I explained why. (That sort of response is just not like me...) I was just so calm the whole time. Then at one point they asked me about a teacher that influenced me and what characteristics a good teacher has and as I talked about my last professor at BYU and about how I probably wouldn't want to be a teacher without having learned what she taught me, I actually started to get a little emotional. That was the kind of interview that it was. So in other words, it was the exact opposite of the horrible on that I had at the charter school. I left the interview feeling fine about it, but not expecting them to offer me the job.)

So back to the first story: During the hour that I was sitting in my car on that Wednesday, I got a call from an administrator at West Jordan High School. She said that they were very interested in me, but they were having trouble getting a hold of 2 of my references and asked me to please get cell phone so she could talk to them. So I set out to contact my references. In the meantime, Steven claimed family emergency and left work early to come meet me and console me. I made phone calls and Steven stopped at his brother's shop to send a message for me on the computer and then I went to the FedEx office store to send another message (one of my contacts was in Spain and just happened to have an internet connection right when I needed to talk to her). I felt like I was all over the place trying so hard to get the info I needed. I finally got that all done and met up with Steven somewhere in SLC.

I called the administrator back and told her what I found out and she said that she had been in contact with them and she would let me know by the next day (or maybe even that night) what they decided. I didn't expect anything to come of it and went on a date with Steven.

We went to Zupas to eat and see Naomi. Then I think we drove around for a minute and looked at going to a movie (but didn't). I don't remember all the little stuff we did.

At one point when we got back to the car, I noticed that I had a voice message. I listened to it.
It was the administrator asking me to call her back. I did and she said, "We would like to offer you the job." And I think I said something like, "Yeah, that sounds great. I'm excited!"
I was offered and accepted my first real job!
I am the new Spanish Teacher at West Jordan High School!

Then we went to Kirkham's and wandered around while I was in a daze.
(For the longest time afterwards (seriously a week and sometimes even now), it felt like a dream. It didn't feel real. I wondered if I had heard her right on the phone or if the conversation where she offered me the job even happened at all. I was sure that they made a mistake and were going to call me back and say, 'Sorry, we actually meant to call someone else...' But that hasn't happened so they must have meant it.)

The rest of the day we did a bunch of little things and called our parents to tell everyone the good news. We went to the D.I. (I bought a bunch of books.) We went to Thanksgiving Point. (I bought a super cute mini triCERAtops key chain. She- Isabel- is my new cheerleader.) We might have made chocolate fondue and watched a movie at home that night too. I don't really remember; the rest of the day is kind of a blur.
It was just such a crazy down and up day for me. I was so sad then I was so happy then I was nervous then I was really exhausted!

So I have already had a dream that the teachers in the classrooms around mine hated me and gave me the evil death glare.
I have also been to a conference to find out more about the Latinos in Action program. (I'm so so excited about that part; it is a super awesome program!)
Now I need to find out some important details like training dates and when school starts and where my room is and who my mentor is and whether or not I have textbooks to work with and if I need to make a AP Board approved disclosure for the AP class and and... oh my!

So much to do! It's a new kind of stress, but I'm excited and really glad to be done with the interviewing stress.
For several reasons (timing and connection with paying tithing and a thought Steven had, things I have read in the scriptures and feelings and confirmations I have had, and just how crazy is seems that they would actually pick me of all people if it just wasn't supposed to be), I can't help but feel that this is the job I'm meant to have right now. So even though I'm super stressed and I frequently doubt my qualifications and abilities, I am choosing to trust that God will help me be able to do the things I need and want to in order to help my students learn Spanish, help others, and become good people. With God's help, I can do that! My heart is the right place and I'm knowledgeable and a hard worker. I believe that He will bless and multiply my efforts. :D Pray for me! Ah! :D

And an awesome photo that I took :D

Post script: 
     So I got a call a couple of weeks ago from the secretary at the awkward charter school telling me that they filled the position and wishing me the best. This didn't surprise me even a little bit. 
     What did surprise me is how a got a call a couple of days ago from one of the men I interviewed with at that school (the one that knows Steven). We talked in Spanish and right off the bat he asked if I had found employment yet. I said yes and he said congratulations and then we chitchatted for a couple minutes and he said, "Well, okay that answers my question." I should have asked he what the question was, but I think I can safely guess that he was going to offer me a job. 
      So either they had everybody else turn them down and had to go to the bottom of their list of interviewees or else I didn't really do that bad in the interview after all (meaning that their 1-10 scale was backwards)... I'm going to believe that it was the second reason. So that makes me feel better about that whole situation. :)